About taking a break and looking in the mirror
After going through a rough time, I'll share with you the secrets behind my success. Just kidding. I've been through hell, this is a chapter of my story.
Hello š Iām Candela Niesl and this is #5 of ā100 Words Voyageā; a newsletter about writing, prompts, life, challenges and how to plan your next piece of art.Ā
Every weekend, I aim to share with you a piece of myself and invite you to write your 100 words. Are you ready to go on this journey? Letās do it!
My top 3 (not so) unexpected episodes of the week:
šµš¼āāļø Iāve been scouting feminist writers, and thanks to it Iāve found 3 outstanding newsletters: āThe Conflicted Womanistā, āZainab Writesā, and āFemstreetā. The scouting continues, so if you know where to find feminist writers, please reach out.
š Not a surprise since, nowadays, most of us have trouble sleeping, but I suffer from insomnia and since meditation did its part, (but still I wasnāt being good at it or it was not enough), I looked for an alternative. āThe Truthā is a podcast that shares short stories from different authors; they last around 25 minutes and the performance is amazing! It does not cure insomnia, but new discoveries and alternatives always serve as an excuse for a celebration.
š¦ These past few days, I was able to put into words so many things that were (and are) so deep down my core that I didnāt think I was ever gonna be able to detach them. But here I am, and this is why this piece is special.
Two days ago I got a new toy. Its camera is amazing, has all the assets one project of a photographer (and a photographer, why not?) could want. However, I realized that although Iāve been playing a lot, I havenāt taken a meaningful picture in a while. Why is that? A question with many random and up to the point answers.
We should all take more meaningful pictures, I mean, how long has it been since youāve last taken a picture thinking āoh, I should print and frame thisā?
For me, it has been way too long. So hereās to us and our new challenge of the week. What would be your first or next meaningful picture? š·
š§š¼āāļø Greetings from Mar Del Plata, the coastal city that has grown on me.
Two weeks ago I had an Anxiety Attack. I didnāt know I was going through it until I realized I had gulped down 2 bags of sugar, felt guilty until the effect started to kick in and guilty turned into energy and a feeling that was something like happiness.
I didnāt write. At least not for me. I wrote only because I work as a freelance copywriter and a woman has to eat (irony everywhere). Though it didn't go well either, the feedback split my soul and Iām still trying to put myself together. Go figure.
I was sleeping as if I was with Covid-19 again. Took naps and, after watching a TV show or a movie, went to bed and didnāt wake up before 12PM. I havenāt realized how much I needed to sleep (in fact I basically denied it) until I began to fall asleep in random places. A bar, the beach, a taxi, a friendās sofa, and the different scenarios go on.
Sometimes (most of the times for me) when you are in a bad place, it feels better to deny it and let time go by than acting on it. Because if you chose to act on it, it directly means that you must acknowledge that something is utterly wrong. And who wants to put its finger on that?
So there I was.
Anxiety clouding my judgement, my body begging me to take a break, going through a writerās block, and asking the Universe āhey, what else can go wrongā?
(Spoiler alert: asking that question is like tempting the Universe to come and play with you in the meanest way possible).
Though my pride was not proud of me, I recognized something was not well. I listened to my survival instinct and began to detoxify myself from my other-self. Not an easy thing to do since the fight you are going through is between you and you and no one else. But reconnecting with my spiritual side, more animal, and letting go of my alter ego always looking for perfection, schedules, and work, was what I needed.
It hurt, but there I was. Smelling lavenders while walking, watching the sky and counting birds, reading short stories, savouring the sea with my tongue, my hair, my body.
Yesterday, I met with a friend. She looked at me and said:
āYour face looks different; you look fresh, well-restedā.
Yes, that could sum up how I am beginning to feel. Fresh, resting my restless nerves and pulse, my body, mind, and soul.
I looked at her and began to share what you are reading here and how lonely that made me feel. She didn't dare to interrupt, but when I finished my crusade, she nodded, looked at me and said:
āWell, yes, I feel you. Iāve been going through the same thingā.
Itās weird. Nobody wants to share how bad things are going, but when one takes the step of self-exposure, it gives the impression that the world (or at least a group of people if not one) was waiting for that person to do so to follow its bravery.
Letās talk about how bad things can go, our solutions, the dark side of the Moon. Share that heavy bag of āmust-doā before drowning into soul-oblivion.
This is a summary of my past few weeks. What about you?
Hereās why you should write 100 words tonight:
šØ Purge the negative thoughts that are going around and playing with your mind. By doing so, you will be introduced to a clear scenario and will be able to plan your next piece.
āļø You need this. Writing about your life (like journaling), a short story or an essay helps to connect with yourself and what you want. Perhaps you have this outstanding idea but you realize that when you put it into words itās not what you expected or it is what youāve wanted and more. Write. Write. Write. And figure it out.
š No one is too old or too young to begin its writing voyage. What are you waiting for? Put those words in action and letās see what you come up with.
You donāt know where to begin? Well, just last week one special person shared with me a prompt she found in a writing book.
āAfter watching yourself in the mirror for a while. Write about your face as if you were describing a landscapeā.
Are you ready? Iāll be waiting for your pieces š
Before this voyage comes to its end:
If you liked this #5 ā100 Words Voyageā but also enjoy the Spanish language, you can follow me onĀ InstagramĀ and also listen to my podcast,Ā āThe Unexpectedā.
If you like what I do and would like to support my work, here you canĀ invite me a drinkĀ in Argentina š¦š· orĀ buy me a beerĀ if you are in any other part of the š.
You can also share this newsletter if you think it would be of interest to any of your friends, family, partners or just casual people you meet out there.
Thanks for sharing this journey with me! I hope it inspires you to write your own stories and share them with the world. After all, is not that what are we made off?
See you next weekend šĀ
Bon voyage!
That writing prompt is so interesting! May give it a try this week if I can work up the nerve to sit in front of a mirror first.
Thank you for sharing, and Iām glad to hear you got a little bit of rest!